Few entrepreneurs talk about this publicly or honestly, but everyone reaches a point where they recognize that they feel like quitting. But how to know when it’s actually time to quit?
Quitting, giving up, letting go, it’s often not hardwired into the entrepreneur’s DNA. We’re told to stick with it, be persistent, and persevere, but that’s not great advice when you start to feel frustrated or resentful. So, what do you do when you don’t know if it’s your resistance talking… or if it’s actually time to give something up?
That time I almost quit…but it wasn’t time to quit!
In 2016, I had just given birth to my second child. She was extremely colicky and woke up every 40 minutes. I was not getting a lot of sleep, and I was exhausted. You might be thinking, “Well duh! It’s normal you want to quit when you’re tired!” That was the story I wanted to tell myself.
That this was just a physical thing, a temporary phase, nothing else. But thankfully I’m a journaler. When I was journaling, all the thoughts I wasn’t allowing myself to think, that I had locked in my mental closet, spilled out onto the page.
I realized I wasn’t loving the conversations I was having with my clients. I loved my clients, and the process of coaching, but I wasn’t excited by the repetitive nature of my program. It felt limiting to me. At the time, I was only offering one program and doing it over and over again was burning me out.
Honestly, I was bored. That’s where my fatigue was coming from. Yes, there was a physical fatigue from not sleeping, but my mental fatigue was coming from this lack of growth. My purpose had expanded.
Quit Vs. Pivot
Now, before we dive in and I share with you how to journal this way yourself, there’s a difference between quitting and pivoting. Quitting means fully walking away from your entire business, from the lifestyle, from being a coach/entrepreneur. If it’s time to quit, you’ll know.
Pivoting is more nuanced, and requires a deeper level of discernment. Ultimately, one is not better than the other. At the end of the day, I want you to have a better framework for decision-making. I don’t want you to make decisions – especially really big ones – from a place of resentment, anger, or frustration.
Instead of giving into your negative feelings, and acting from a place of pain (what I call “Wounded” and explore much more deeply in our self paced Impact with Clarity program), I want you to dive into that pain deeper and identify exactly what about your current situation is draining you.
Only when you develop a way to learn from what’s going on can you harness those learnings and move forward. Here’s how.
Listen to Your Intuition
The first thing I want you to do when you’re thinking about quitting is to listen to your intuition. Intuition is your knowingness that trumps your intellectual knowledge. It’s what you somehow know and have access to that doesn’t always (or even often) make logical sense. If you’re unclear and don’t have a solid process for getting in touch with your intuition and inner wisdom, I highly recommend taking Impact with Clarity.
Because the processes I teach you there transcend all the strategic and tactical moves you’re currently obsessed with and spending energy on. Playing from a place of deep knowingness—where you have access to and confidence in your decisions—is ultimately exactly what’s going to get you the freedom you seek. Slow down and reread the above sentence. Feel it. Does it resonate?
If it does, here’s that link.
If you’re not sure yet, try this exercise and see where it takes you. The last thing I want is for you to put me on some sort of pedestal and believe ANYTHING I say that doesn’t feel like your truth. This is about you becoming. Becoming the teacher you’ve been looking for.
Are you growing towards your goals?
A huge piece of discernment is being able to tell when you’re no longer growing. Because the Soul’s work in this lifetime is growth, expansion and fulfillment. Anything else is a distraction.
So the very first question you must ask yourself is … Where is my energy parked? Ever heard that old chestnut: “What you focus on grows”? Well, what it leaves out is that it’s entirely possible for your conscious mind to focus on one thing (your goal or desired outcome) and your unconscious (or wounded self) to focus on another thing (usually a story of lack). The problem is that your Wounded Self has high speed to your subconscious (or manifesting) mind. And your poor Conscious Self only has dial up. So which messages do you think get through? The ones from Wounded.
Here’s a quick gut check to do (I have a much deeper and more robust process in the actual program).
Check in with yourself and see if any of these stories feel like they’re on the money:
- I’m not worthy—I am not a lovable or good enough person for this much amazing to happen to me or for it to last
- What I want is not available to me
- I am not capable enough/ don’t have the endurance for this (often happens to folks who had inconsistent feedback from father figures in childhood. They work super hard but feel unable to control whether or not they’ll “win”)
- It will be taken away anyway, so why bother
- I don’t have what it takes (need to get more certifications/ training before I can have what I truly want
- I am fundamentally broken (I can work harder than anyone else and still never get anywhere because the rules of reality don’t seem to apply to me and my reality is broken)
Ding Ding Ding! If any of the above wounded stories hit home for you, chances are no amount of strategy is going to solve your problem. This isn’t a lack of effort. It’s a lack of internal permission and alignment.
So what to do next?
Look, you can keep scouring the internet for free information, or you can get proven processes that actually work to connect you with your own internal wisdom. Because I freaking promise you—the teacher you’re REALLY looking for is yourself. Trying to learn your truth from other people is going to drive you banana pancakes, unless what they’re teaching you is to tap into your own innate genius.
You are good enough and wise enough.
It’s time you start believing in yourself and taking control of that brilliance of yours. Sounds good?